So my T called tonight, and asked if I had thought about our conversation on Friday, and if I am willing to try one of his collegues. She speacializes in trauma and child sexual abuse, and has EDMR training. Level One.

He talked with her, and she is willing to see me, she has an opening and would like to sit down and talk for a few sessions and then I can make my decision. My T said he is not abandoning me, but since things aren't going well, and the hospital isn't what I want to do, he thinks she can really help me.

I did agree to it, I don't really care what happens right now, just feel overwhelmed with everything, and not really caring what or where this goes.

Nervous about seeing someone new, sad about leaving my T. Feel like even though I know he is thinking what is best for me, but still feeling abandoned!