I've been seeing my t for well over 10 years and still don't have a secure attachment to her. I think my attachment style is disorganized. Even though I've made great progress in other areas of my life, thanks to therapy, I've become more and more negative about my potential to ever heal from my trauma and attachment wounds. The last betrayal I suffered years ago was the straw that broke the camel's back. It destroyed any remaining threads of trust I had. My t is so caring and kind, which means that any step closer I take to her, or any small amount of soothing or care I allow myself to take in from her, it just fuels my most deep and terrifying fear of attaching to someone who will ultimately walk away from my life.