Rose that is one of the worst ways to get your point across, but I do see what you are trying to do. And you are so right. Things can turn out two different ways.

The way listed above or letting him have time to grow and you time to grow. Separate from one another and let some real changes take place. Do the hard work now and grow stronger. Check back with your thought about him in 6 months and see how you feel.
(maybe even a year)