I did believe I had some sort of genuine connection with the one T, that had nothing to do with therapy or came about despite therapy. But it was distorted by therapy and the role playing (as you say) and by all her evasions and manipulations, so that I still don't know the nature of it or how much was real. It was such a confusing mess I can't even describe it coherently. In general i see therapy as too contrived for much real connection. It's connection-for-hire.