I cannot believe I can even begin to consider that I may actually have healed from all the abuse and trauma. I feel like my soul has been set free!

I am no longer just surviving. I am alive! I can see potential! I used to live my life out of spite, I accomplished things as a thumb of the nose to my step mother who always said I couldn't. It was always a "see! I CAN!", it was always a fight, a war. And believe it or not, that actually held me back! I spent so much energy every single day just surviving the pain, just getting through the day, just preparing in case someone got mad, or yelled at me, or in case I messed up, walking around on egg shell. God that's exhausting!

I actually feel like an adult woman now. A woman who can not only take care of herself (see, I can do it!! out of spite) but a grown woman who can CARE FOR herself! Those are two entirely different things. I am now CARING FOR myself. I am losing weight, working out, eating well, feeling great.

I want you all to know that there is HELP, you can do more than just SURVIVE. EMDR therapy has given me back my life, it has given me A life.

Now when I look back at something my SM did or said that always haunted me, instead of it being a reflection on me, my thoughts are more like, "What a *****, how could she do that." Instead of being filled with so much pain. Yes, I am angry that so much of my life was stolen from me. Sad that I have missed so many opportunities, but, the thing is, I have them NOW!!!

Please please please, if you are in therapy and it isn't working for you or is taking too long, TRY EMDR therapy, give it 4 sessions, just to see if it works for you the same as it worked for me.