I feel like mine with both T and marriage counselor were when it felt like something was offered or promised to me, then was taken away with what seemed like a unilateral decision by the T (future individual sessions with marriage counselor, unlimited e-mailing with T). Though each was a bit more complex than that, particularly with T. I think in both cases, it triggered fears of abandonment going back to my early years.

I got through both of them, but it took a few weeks to a month or two. And it would be like, I'd leave a session thinking, "OK, I'm good with everything now," then a few hours or a few days later, would realize that I wasn't OK. That there was more that needed to be discussed. In each case, I was able to move past it due to some combination of the following: T or MC admitted that they had made a mistake, that they'd offered something they shouldn't have, that they'd been unclear, that they felt bad about what happened, that they understood why I was upset. Had they just remained defensive and insistent that they were right, without trying to understand my perspective, then I don't think I could have moved past it.

Incidentally, the ruptures in both cases were very intense to me, with a feeling almost as if my heart was being broken, even with a physical feeling in my chest along with the emotions. That suggested to me that they were tied to childhood stuff because of the intensity. Considering that I have some transference for both, it makes sense.