Thank you so much for all the information. Yes, so aspects are scary, but also it's reassuring to find that other parents are out there as well.

I have talked to my husband and we will draw up a family care contract. This way if I go off the deep end, there will be people in place to give temporary care to our son. He (husband) is of course listed first, followed by my mother etc...down the line.

Hopefully that will help if the need ever arrises to prove who can care for him in a competant manner.