Sounds like a trigger to me. It'd be like me going for a stroll in the woods (environment of former trauma) and/or staying at my dad's. It is a physical/external representation of what you endured. It's not like a flashback or nightmare that goes away and you can get yourself back to reality because it is actually there. This can put you in emotional distress for any amount of time and it sounds like yours is still there and digging in. You're mind is having difficulty letting that trigger go. A blackout is often a response to a more extreme emotional distress.
For instance, my visit to my dad's a few days ago rocked me pretty hard. I've been having pretty bad anxiety and depressive symptoms since. Trust me, I'm fighting hard to keep my dissociative symptoms at bay. I don't want to "wake up" and seeing what I did in that state.
In another words, this doesn't sound like an excuse to me. It sounds like a terrible trigger that caused enough pain to get you there. And hey, I broke and self harmed after a whole two years of not doing so a few months back. "Everything, with enough pressure applied, will break", as ****ed up as that saying is I've always believed it's accuracy.