My trauma(s) and sadness runs deep. I've given up trying to find a sole cause behind my depression. Therapy could help me get somewhere but I won't get my hopes up about it. I have this fear, it's not necessarily an anxiety thing. It's this heart wrenching fear that I'm just broken. When people who know me see me, they just see broken pieces of what I used to be and how weak I've become. Because I am, I'm just weak and broken. I've let it all just pull me under. I keep sinking and sinking. I can't even seem to fight it anymore. I let go of the reigns and will now crash into the canyon. I've been called weak and broken by several family members ever since I went to the hospital earlier this year. Of course, before that they had no idea what I was going through. Because I was forced into a hospital, I am weak. Because I needed it, I am weak. Because I don't hide my issues all of the time, I am broken. Because I have told them what I suffer from, I am broken.
According to one of them, I'm just emotional and need to grow up. "There's nothing wrong with you. Get over it."
Huh, maybe I should just quit talking; to anyone. Real life, online; to anyone. What is it really to say anything, anyway? I'm just whining, after all. "**** or get off the pot", right? Just hurts to know that they don't give a damn unless I can help them. (I'm not talking about anyone on PC).