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Old Oct 25, 2007, 10:23 AM
DonnaJL DonnaJL is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2007
Posts: 6
<font color="blue"> Hi
I feel that my anxiety has taken over my life. A little background, I'm twice divorced from abusive men, and now in a long term relationship with...guess what? an alcoholic.
I really didn't know he was addicted when we met and formed the relationship, I knew he drank but I'd have a drink too occasionally so I didn't wake up to the problem for a while. He is a wonderful guy when he's sober. Not so much when drinking. I left husband #2 to live with this man, I'd been legally sep. for a long time but still living with #2 as I couldn't afford to be on my own.
Now I am here 18 years, and recently lost my job so I am in a worse position to leave than I was before. I am torn between staying and going, as I do love this guy but I don't like him much of the time (for obvious reasons).
Losing my job was a major trauma as I had been there in a management position for 27 years, and when a new owner took over he fired me over the phone. I had been suffering from anxiety and moderate agoraphobic before the job ended and have been using xanax sparingly for a couple of years.
My elderly widowed mother thinks she is ill, although I've had her to numerous specialists who can find nothing wrong, but she acts like she's helpless and dying everyday and this is wearing heavily on my brother and I.
My adult daughter is currently living with us as she is between permanent positions, and my s/o rants about this when he's drinking so I am in the middle, where I also was during my marriage to #2 who was mentally abusive to her. I was seeing a therapist until I learned that my insurance didn't cover it, leaving me with a good sized balance, so I will have to curtail my visits with her until I find a job. I hope I will find others who share my anxiety and will be able to give me coping techniques for that and for dealing with an alcoholic partner. I tried Al Anon but am not comfortable with faith based organizations.
If you've stuck with me so far, thanks for reading </font>