This is a common situation, unfortuantely, with ppl who's normal lifestyle if of abusing.
You have a lot of good suggestions in this thread already. Since you know his wife, I would advise her of his coming to your home unwelcomed, and that you are going to have to begin calling the police in the future. If you can't call her, then write her a short letter and take it over or mail it.
I must absolutely agree that YOU MUST CALL THE POLICE as soon as he shows up, regardless of anything. I wouldn't go into any long story of his actions otherwise until you are ready to do that (you can receive assistance through the police victims dept or the hospital rape center perhaps, and they can advise you on that.) OR you can call the police and file all those charges, of his assaults and stalking and nuisances.
BUT you must at least call the police and report a person lurking at your door. Don't even ask to be contacted, if you can't handle that... just let them scare him off time after time...that way THEY will take him in for loitering or such.(Or maybe public drunkeness.)
You have don't nothing wrong, and should act in your own best interest. But you do the best you can do for now.
(((hugs)))