Yesterday I cut again more or less by accident, I was playing with some scissors and suddenly had snipped a little hole on my leg. At the time, I was so startled and scared I stopped the bleeding immediately and put a band-aid on it. Ever since I did that, I have been craving the blood the steel the feel the release. I want to cut so much. I don’t have any reason to cut but I want to cut. I think about it and I feel as if I was justified cos I did it once and got nothing from it. I have been dreaming of it. I already have to tell therapist tomorrow what I did what difference if it is a snip or a slash. Or several. I am stressed out over my son and granddaughter and I just want to see the blood flow.

Cut last night, I palmed a knife but it was too dull could only scratch with it, so I got a pair of scissors and used them to open a tiny wound on my thigh, it barely bled but enough the few drips seemed to relieve the awful pressure. I want to cut some more but I have therapy today and am gonna try to stop this nonsense.