I'm not a very demonstrative person. I know a lot of people find me hard to read. I don't really express emotion much in session; I've only cried once and that was during a rupture. I guess I have a level of self-protection with most topics which has built up over years, but the relationship with T is the one thing I am less self-protective about and more vulnerable, because I rely on him to protect me emotionally. So when something goes wrong with the relationship my guard is at its lowest.