Well here I am trapped by an invisible monster called Agoraphobia and ADHD (which has rendered me a DEPENDENT PERSONALITY), a HATE this trapped mindset and the feelings of utter hopelessness that it is causing me!!! I have been CRYING OUT about this for so... long that it makes me sick, sick of me! Sick of who I am , of WHAT I am. I cannot see my way OUT, death seems like the only option and boy have I been wanting to die for the last few years!

I am married to a very narcissistic man, who is very domineering, controlling, and rages at me, intimidates me into backing off and away. I have grown to despise this man, but I cannot get free of him!!! I have never supported myself and now I am too sick to work, hows that for a fine howdy do you do!?

I hate who and what I am, I see myself as extremely defective and stupid. I am 64yrs what a wasted life.