Quote:
Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006
Well I will be completely honest. Based on your posts I've read, you seem to have kind of a generally negative outlook or perspective of men. Saying things like 'why can't guys be honest.." and in that same post you kind of stated that they 'all think that way' lumping all guys into a big ugly group. That's how it came off to me. Well to be honest, I don't know for sure but likely depending on how you talk to guys, those attitudes may be come apparent in your conversations, profile, messages etc to guys. It may actually affect how you are perceived.
the idea that you're on dating sites or online to find a guy to date and you're already talking about goals and how you know you don't want kids but you want marriage, I don't know if that's all laid out before them when you message them, but it's kind of very forward. Do this one step at a time. Everything does not need to be laid out on the table even before you've met or made a date.
I know for me if I wanted to date a girl, even if I am thinking sometime in my life I want to get married again, it's not the first thing on my mind when looking.
it could be a case of too much information.
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Sorry but you are also wrong.
If I see a guy on a dating website I like, and let's say the guy's profile says "I am a nerd and love music" and I message them saying "So what makes you a nerd? What types of music do you absolutely love?"
HOW is me saying that to them in a negative sense? Because thats how my chat's go with these guys we will message a simple "Hey whats up" and then ask simple things "what are you up too? How are you?" What do you like to do for fun? What are your hobbies?" etc.
So how is asking a question like those being negative or me giving attitude?
To me, I would rather do it like this, get ALL of the BIG stuff out of the way. The sex talk, kid talk, dating, relationship, marriage talk.
Because what if I find a guy and we date for 6 months and by then I tell him I want to wait until marriage to have sex or I want to get married later down the line, and hearing this at the 6 month mark, causes them to step away, that would have wasted my time if they end up doing that sort of thing.
And that has happened to me before as well. Trust me I nave been screwed over by guys A LOT of times over the years of my dating experiences and it sucks. I have been hurt a lot.
I have seen female and male profiles on dating websites and apps where the people clearly state "I am looking for marriage" so why can they get away with saying what they want and yet I get butchered for it?