I went out tonight with some friends, but the whole thing ended up triggering me. Started with triggers tbh. How am I meant to cope with day to day triggers?

Honestly right now I want to be drunk (I'm getting there) and I know that I will end up self harming. But how am I meant to cope in these situations? I don't think i can.

I have spent much of the last few years suicidal. And while I'm not suicidal right now I know that it won't take much to get me to that.

I just don't know how to deal with life in a healthy way...