Thread: Ruptures
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Old Oct 09, 2016, 08:24 AM
awkwardlyyours awkwardlyyours is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by _Mouse View Post
I'm adopted. I don't demand T has training in that. We all have unique things. I expect a skilled T to be able to work work all of me. No matter what ones sexuality. We are all human. Yes our circumstances carry different obstacles. I liken it to AA members who wore their alcoholism like a badge of pride. They were more interested in that, then really getting to know themselves.
The last time I checked, there was no stigma or you know, socially sanctioned violence against adoption (or drinking for that matter) pretty much anywhere in the world.

Comparisons are not only odious etc but make little sense in this case.

And, for what it's worth, my current T (and my former T) has no training in LGBT issues -- however, I am in the US. And, my reasons for being here are in no small part driven by the fact that like QM's country, I come from a place where it's not even blinked upon to commit serious violence against gay folks. So, yeah I am safe and ensconced in my little bubble here in the US and have been out and waving the rainbow flag for many years now -- I don't need a T to help me deal with that issue.

But, I also personally know gay folks who've either been through harrowing experiences -- often started at a very early age and it's hard to figure out how much of it was caused by some early radar-type detection of their gayness vs. just f-ed up general family / cultural stuff. And, for folks like that, landing with a T who doesn't have the first clue on how to deal with any of it would be seriously re-traumatizing to say the least.

Finally, the harrowing experiences needn't always be egregious violence (although in many cases it is) but can also be a systematic, rigid homophobic response which can shape one's life choices throughout and one may not be aware of it until well, it's too late -- fish in water etc.

In general, I think it would help -- here on PC especially -- if we assume before we post that a poster is the ultimate authority on their own issues and so, any wisdom we choose to dispense (as hard-won as it may be) always comes with that caveat.

ETA: And, before we assume that a supposedly skilled T should somehow be able to tackle anything that comes their way, it would help to remember that implicit bias has been proven to show up in just about everyone. T's -- skilled or awfully unskilled -- are not exactly immune to it (much as I loathe the pablum of multiculturalism / diversity in the field of psychology [as everywhere else], the concept did originate for a good reason).

ETAA: To wrap up my soapbox on this issue, gayness -- unlike say, even race or ethnicity -- is not only invisible but is also an identity that one doesn't usually share with one's family / kith and kin. In the face of intense hostility from within those nearest to her, a gay kid would then usually seek refuge outside of the family -- except in a severely homophobic society, there's little of that to be found. So, even if you're looking at it from the lens of what does a safe space -- of any sort -- mean to a gay kid, there's nothing that isn't compromised given larger societal issues that are only mirrored and magnified in the personal space. So, again not really comparable to stuff that doesn't evoke the same sort of visceral hostile response in others.

Last edited by awkwardlyyours; Oct 09, 2016 at 08:55 AM.
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