pretty much thats what I feel like all the time I don't know how I should feel.

I am out of a really horrible relationship...**** I nearly have been for a whole year of my life now.

and I yet I still struggle with feeling happy on a regular basis. I take ANY tiny little negative comment or compliant that someone says and it hits me like a sack of bricks.

since I have done PTSD therapy I have come to realize just how many times in my life I was maniuplated and used by friends, family people that I thought I could trust and that I really just couldn't.

when I look back at my life and I see how often this happened to me. It makes me parnoid, every time in my life i felt I could trust someone or be happy with someone it turns out I just be lied to or maniuplated in some fashion.

So how now do I move on and not be paranoid how do I truly be happy? each person gets to that place in their life in different ways.

I know that much.

Just cause I get into arguments with my fiancé does not makes him like ex I was with a year ago that stole from me an lied to me... and I know that but sometimes i don't feel like maybe brain does. I try as best I can to keep insane in my head but I don't know if I am really doing that.

Gosh know I am trying to...

the fact I am empathic does not really help me out much either, or just that I am superly emotionally sensitive.

learning how to cope with things in my life, with my issues I have and things I delt with in my life is not easy for me but I do the best I can but half the time I still feel like I am falling apart.