Hi muchluv,

Sorry to hear how hard it is for you to function. I can relate very much with what you say.

I find when things get really bad I "shut down" so the world goes grey and fuzzy and I feel numb and empty.
I agree it is a respite from the pain, but then that gets too much and I want to feel again.
I think sometimes we do these things to survive.

I really hope you get some of the support and understanding you need.
PC can be a very good place to start.

*MEGAHUGS*

We're here for each other.