I really don't know what to feel anymore, most of my emotions are in direct conflict with each other. That is, when I can focus enough to try to comprehend what I'm feeling...

It's like, for each thing I feel there's someone else in my head making me feel the opposite, which usually results in a lot of screaming and shouting back and forth in my head... It's getting a bit tiring...

But I probably still have about a year of 50-60 of my life to serve... Making me wonder what it is exactly that I did to deserve this sentence. Then again every time I think this, another discussion starts in my head where I'm reminded that I have myself to thank for all this...

That window seemed safe for me for a long time. But it seems now that i was staring through my prison window...