I'm currently in my 5th year of college. I'm finally transferring into University next year. I've been struggling more and more as time goes on. I feel so awful about myself that everyone around me has graduated already and has their careers and I'm still trying to tackle my way through school. I've only been taking the amount of credits I am comfortable with and that my financial aid will allow, which has taken me forever. You'd think it would be a motivation for me to work so hard to get through it all, but it's been the opposite. My anxiety for homework has been increasing so much and I'm only taking two courses that are 6 credits combined. I feel like a complete failure for having such a hard time over two classes. I don't have a job either and I couldn't handle it. I feel so overwhelmed and stressed out. I really want to start doing the things that I love like music and theatre that actually relate to what I'm going into. I'm 23 years old and I feel like by time I finally graduate I'm going to be at least in my 30s with how this is going and I really don't want that. I'm so stressed out I just want to succeed and follow my dreams. Everyone keeps telling me it's not a big deal but it is to me. But my homework anxiety is increasing so bad I just can't find the motivation to do it anymore and I've tried everything in the book to try to make it easier for me such as breaking it down into parts and taking breaks. A tutor is not an option either because I feel unsafe doing that. I don't have much of a support system and I just can't. I took a break last semester to try to get some more mental health help and that never happened. All it did was cause me to have blood reactions with the medication they tried to shove down my throat because they cared more about earning commission off medication than what the medication actually did. I'm going to be moving too next year to University and I have no idea how I am going to survive on my own without a job. I've tried many jobs and I walked out of every single one of them the first day because they threw me into full panic attacks and mental break downs because I'm so terrified of getting hurt. I feel so lost and alone and I just don't know what to do everything is just so overwhelming.