I thought about this more and I still think it makes things worse. It keeps you in the past and prevents a future.

I seen others struggle with this and they just don't seem to be able to move.

I think know what happen, not blaming yourself and making up a story... see it fit what it is, is fine and good. But once that has been completed you have to move on or you will end up in a loop.

So I need to move with the present so I can have a future