Hi all and thank you so much for the really wide diversity of views: it was an unusual response, but absorbing it further and reading so many perspectives on it, I don't think it was harmful.

Harmful was the response my 'bad'ex T gave me to a similar question, which was 'I'm surprised you haven't killed yourself already'. I think both we're trying to empathize with the depth of my despair, but somehow this T's response actually felt more validating than anything.

I think my surprise...again in further reflection...was that even though I hadn't talked very much about how hopeless and despairing I feel sometimes, somehow he knew it enough to not answer 'what do you mean, people like you?' or question the question. He responded to a really straight question in a really straight manner. And I think there was a mutual, unspoken understanding of what I was asking and saying, in terms of the sorts of issues I am battling with. It worked for us, as T and client. I don't know if it would work for everyone.

It did, though, evoke quite a sense of determination in me about not 'succumbing' to the thoughts and feelings that dog me from time to time. Though having been further down that path before, I also know how hard it is to see any kind of reason, such as it is today, when in that place.

I think what I was really asking was for him to help me not be a statistic. And his response made it feel that he took my question very seriously...and it sort of put us on the same page.