Hi I'm having a really rough time. 18 months since I was diagnosed and been seeing a therapist every week since then. Anyway I've kind of got by with only 3 occasions of self-harm/suicide attempt in the last 18 months....
Today I found myself buying numbing cream to use so that I can self harm severley. I don't even know why I wanted to buy the cream because for me it was always about feeling the pain...
I've had a rupture in the therapeutic relationship with my therapist and since that happened I don't understand myself. I feel lost, not know what I want or who I really am. I don't know who to ask for help from or what I should do about these strong urges.
Appreciate any advice xxx