In my defense, my gf's did their promiscuous acts mostly when not even with me and not due to my making anything happen.

I was much more selective and less promiscuous than they were.

My friend E is not toxic and we were always good friends.

C is mostly her own worst enemy. I think she genuinely loves me, but she is also jealous with her own misery and likes to take others down to make herself feel better.

And that high school promiscuity was in the wake of my father's death and my virginity lost to date rape (which I did not understand at the time).

I think i have never really matured and that there is a lot wrong with me.