He's been testing you to see how little he can get away with offering you. And I very much agree with you that this is addiction on your part - addiction driven by loneliness . . . and fear of the emotional withdrawal that you'll go through, if you distance yourself from him. He knows all this.

If he's been coming around for a year, then he probably does have more of an emotional need for you than you or he realizes. That gives you some leverage. But you've got to use that leverage.

You've got to raise the bar on what you expect and be willing to walk, if he doesn't up his game. Just pick one thing at a time . . . like maybe you will not keep paying so much for activities the two of you do together.