I don't know if it's anxiety, PTSD or BPD... I truly don't know what it is...but it's hell.

I feel guilty ALL OF THE TIME. Even as a kid, I just felt like I had done something awful even though I was a very good kid. I'm always stressed...and now over the past 2 or 3 years it's been escalating. I feel like I deserve nothing good, and that all the bad things that happen to me are because I deserve it. I know this sounds dramatic, but I truly annihilate my own self worth and I don't know why. My self talk is awful. I've lost all of my confidence.

Why? What is this? Does anyone else have this constantly? What do you do? I'm so worn down with it. Everyone says I don't need to beat myself up...and I'd love not to...but I can't. I feel awful all of the time. The only time it goes away is when I'm drinking...and that's only for an hour or 2.

Why do I feel so inherently guilty? What is that?