My husband and I have been together for 14 years. The first few years of our relationship I slowly reveilved my past traumas. It always came out when I was intoxicated. Then for days/weeks afterwards, I would worry he was looking at me different, I felt such shame I wanted to cover my face. But he was always so kind...he was actually angrier for me than I was for myself. Seeing things through his eyes helped me gain compassion for myself. My husband is the only one who knows the extend of my past traumas...my parents have seen some of it (Also caused some which they regret)....my best friend saw some and I've shared a few bits and pieces with her when I've been drinking. In the case of my friend, I probably regret telling her even though she is kind. I really think I "need" to talk to a professional about it....I've hinted at things but never been able to talk about the truly important stuff in therapy. ive just never felt connected to a therapist or had enough trust to get it out. I quit drinking years ago. It sometimes wonder if I should drink a little before therapy?