And it's a problem.

I just came out of a manic cycle. Possibly two manic cycles, one after another, the last few weeks. I thought it was just intense anxiety...but in retrospect...racing thoughts, disturbed or little sleep, hyper activity, impulsive behavior....

Impulsive behavior that has gotten me into a complicated predicament at work. I'm resigning on Friday, because being there is emotionally too distressing at this point. To summarize. Shared something with a boss. Boss shared something extremely personal...I realized he likes me. But he's my boss and has a gf...Now I've become a problem for him. They've been scheduling us at different times, which means I've been getting the worst hours and there isn't much of a point in me even working there any more. All because I impulsively decided to swap stories with him. I had no romantic intentions behind my actions.

Everything has been hell since then. I have feelings for him. Its awkward.

But I'm relieved not to be manic anymore. My mind is finally at peace again.

Moral of the story....its really important to consider the consequences of your impulses. To think things through with the voice of sanity. Otherwise you end up brokenhearted and trying to hold together your dignity.

But I'm going to laugh about this some day. In fact I'm kind of laughing about it now. Especially if they think I'm so clueless I don't get what's going on. Second moral...learn to laugh at yourself and life's predicaments.