i just feel like im sinking.on the outside things seem ok...i appear balanced...far from it.
High energy for a couple days..anxious..insomnia creeping...energy quickly faded...crashing.

I really hate myself, my thoughts, my life, i hate myself for hating those things.
I spend way to much time thinking of all the wrong things i have done, all my failures.
Things are looking great for my 2 teens...i cling to that with everything in me to keep pushing....

its terrible but truth is, i dont want to be here. Havent for a long long time.