Quote:
Originally Posted by sumowira
How do you react to it? Are scars or wrinkles okay to you? Do you obsess over them and think you'll be judged by them? Do you have to keep them covered so they can't be seen? Or do you see them as badges of courage? How quickly do you get used to new ones? Do they trigger your avoidance? Do you think they are grotesque on you but fine on other people? Do you feel like you're being excessively vain to worry about them?
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I am constantly in a low sense of embarrassment re: my facial lines and wrinkles, though they are mostly my own fault...lots of sun exposure since young and earlier smoking. I also have scars on my wrists from self harming and the suture repair, which are even more embarrassing. Yes, they do trigger my avoidance, but I try very hard not to let facial lines/wrist scars run my life. And, no, I don't feel I'm being excessively vain.
I'm going in for surgery tomorrow a.m. for removal of a skin cancer on my L temple. I should be worrying about whether or not I'll need radiation, but I'm more concerned how the scar will look.
If you feel your wrinkles or lines trigger your avoidance, I can only hope you will not let them ruin any part of your life. Play up one part of your face or body that you like. People see my eyes, first, which are my best feature (in the middle of all my lines and wrinkles!!). My eyes are blue and during the few times I smile, people say my eyes smile.
I'm sorry if your appearance has a big impact on your avoidance. Perhaps, when I get older - 66 now - I'll be even more concerned, but perhaps I'll be less avoidant, too.
Being avoidant is difficult to treat, but improvements are possible if you want to get closer to others.