You're not a failure for trying meds. I hate that the stigma about taking psych meds is still out there. I am an artist too and depression makes me totally uninterested in creating anything.

Can I ask you a question? Is the doctor managing your medication your GP or a psychiatrist? There's only so much GP's know in realm of the delicate intricacies involved with psychiatric medication. IMO, I think you stopped the celexa too soon and you might want to reconsider. Yes, the side effects when introducing a med often feel unbearable and like you can't go on. I've experienced it all with various meds (never taken celexa though) - nausea, fatigue, loss of appetite, insomnia, weight gain, weight loss. But I always push through it and commit to at least 6-8 weeks of faithfully taking a medication before I decide whether or not to continue. But that's just me. In any event, your doctor should at least give you something to help you sleep if you decide to restart the celexa. I find avoiding caffeine as much as I can + a simple Xanax extended release at night (1-2 mg) does the trick. Traditional sleeping pills don't work for me, or they make me unbearably drowsy the next morning.

Personally, I am treatment-resistant and I've tried 3 or 4 different classes of drugs. Right now, I am only on 2 meds: 6 mg EMSAM (an MAOI in the form of a transdermal patch) and Xanax ER. I discovered that the higher doses of EMSAM gave me horrific insomnia that I am still trying to recover from. The benefits of taking medication transdermally is that it bypasses my digestive tract, which is always bothered by virtually any medication I take. But I still am pretty damn depressed and have trouble doing everyday tasks.

Another thing - in my 15+ years of experience in the school of hard knocks as a psychiatric patient, I find that doctors downplay side effects overall. It's important to advocate for yourself, but I'm sure you know that already. Good luck to you in whatever you decide to do