The words should and shouldn't I was told to get rid of a long time ago. I'd should and shouldn't all over myself. Those words have held a lot of unrealistic expectations/old rules in them. I've gotten better at catching myself saying those and then asking myself who says you should or you shouldn't and why, who made that rule and does that fit today?
Another thing I didn't realize is that when someone would give me a compliment and I would say no or in anyway not except it that it was self defeating. The exampel I was given was when someone says, I like your dress; my response would always be oh this ole thing or oh I just got it at a garage sale or something similar. Besides learning to say the word no saying just thank you when given a compliment was like swollowing a bolder to say the least. I could barely choke out those words. Today is much better feels more like a rock than a bolder. Progress not perfection
Larks