I had a therapist here for 19 years. I am doing what I decided. Maybe, if I could go back 30 years, I would say, "No thank you." and decide he wasn't worth it. But I'm at where I'm at. He's not really abusive. He was never domineering. I guess he was more dependant than anything else. A former boyfriend who wanted me back said I was letting this guy "bleed me." That was true, but he did evolve beyond that quite a bit. Now he doesn't use me financially. But I don't believe he gives much thought to the value of the services I provide. Years ago I did this for pay.

I feel so taken for granted. I like caring for him. I just wish he showed me that he felt fortunate to have me here . . . . and I wish I could go home for a few days at a time. But, no, I run back and forth between his place and mine.

And I wish he realized that I am trying to roll a heavy stone uphill when depression weighs on me. I have "atypical depression," which eases up nicely when I feel cared for.