Hi, jagster. I understand dealing with the death of a close family member. And the holidays are tough to get through the first year.

I know you've heard it before, but it does get less difficult, as long as you allow yourself to feel the loss, etc., etc. I think I finally began to think clearly and positively about my sister's death about a year afterwards. It still hurts, and I still miss her, but time allows you to put it all in perspective and handle the pain better. Oh yeah, and I did spend extra time at the therapist and increased my meds to help with the extra depression... whatever it took to not succumb to the darkness entirely...

I feel for you during this time and wish I could make it all feel okay, but all I can do is tell you it's okay to grieve and feel terrible. It's normal -- anything else should raise concerns...

Rich