I am so exhausted I don't know where to start. I've been logging these very long work weeks, working at least 6, if not 7 days a week. It didn't really bother me until the past couple of days when a disruption to my sleep schedule has really put my ability to function in jeopardy.

A little history, with my depression and PTSD, if I don't get good sleep, all else starts to go to hell. I manage during the week and completely crash on weekends (except for the part of the weekend I have to work). Putting in 60+ hour work weeks wasn't hurting me too bad until this weekend.

I crashed really hard on Saturday...barely got up to do anything except take the dog to the park. Then, before I had to go into work on Sunday (yesterday) for a few hours, I took my dog for a short walk, and two small 8-10 week old stray puppies followed us home on our walk. I asked around and couldn't find owners to claim them. I took them inside and made them comfortable in the bathroom until I could get home from work. When I got home, I let them out, they romped around then fell asleep. I gave them baths and then it was bedtime....Well, one of the puppies didn't seem to like the idea of bedtime. She stayed awake ALL night. And kept me awake all night. And I needed to be at work by 7am, which is 2 hours earlier than I normally go in. I don't even usually get up until 8:30am. (I prepare everything for work the night before so all I have to do is get dressed and walk the dog before heading to the office, which is 10 minutes away.)

So on no sleep, I had to go to this very important board meeting and represent my organization on a very important appeal. And I do NOT function on no sleep. I know some people can, but I am not one of them. And then when I got to the office I realized I had a deadline today for a very important proposal that I had done no work on. I am so exhausted my brain can barely function--and this is because of my depression--and yet I'm going to have to find strength somewhere to not only make this proposal happen, but for it to be good work.

And I'm stuck with the puppies for one more night because the shelter isn't open on Mondays (they weren't open yesterday either).

I feel like things are falling apart around me...I'm going to have to call in sick at some point this week, and I think it's going to be tomorrow, just to get back into the right head space.

I don't know if any of this post makes sense...I'm running on fumes.

Thanks for listening.

Seesaw