Remember that your feelings of frustration and hopelessness are symptomatic of your disease; your ability to accurately evaluate yourself and your circumstances have been compromised. You are still so young; there are people you will meet, support groups you could join, activities or interests you might discover, and job opportunities that might await you in the future: all possibilities that your depression is preventing you from recognizing. You could still recover(!) You are more than your depression is allowing to see in yourself; you have to be strong and have faith and patience. You didn't mention treatment in your post; consult a doctor if you haven't already. It might be impossible to visualize at the moment, but things could completely turn around for you.