Hi there! You show great self-awareness Venusss. But clearly, the reactions from people to your personality is hurtful. It hurts you when people say you are unlikeable and distance themselves from you and talk about you behind your back. It's only natural, because we humans are social beings and we don't like being distanced, treated with coldness and made to feel alone. Sometimes we feel lonely even if we do have friends and significant others.

You say you are actively trying to change bad parts of your character but you also wonder if you even have to do that when people should accept you for who you are. Maybe you can weigh the consequences of 'changing' against 'not changing'. Which will have better consequences in the long-run?

Sorry if I sound presumptuous. It's just that I can understand a little of what it means to feel 'unlikeable'. Like you I decided that I really had to work on some aspects of my personality if I wanted to be happier and have healthier relationships with people. It's hard to change aspects of our self but you'll feel good about becoming a better person. There are bound to be people who look at you in disbelief and look at you weirdly for changing your values and behaviors, but if you are determined nothing will matter!