Hi almedafan, you never know what will happen in session. Can you let it unfold and not have expectations? It sounds like your expectations are all bad ones, and how is a session to have a chance of being healing or helpful or supportive if the client walks in the room thinking that? It sounds like you've had a bit of a rupture with your T. Maybe this session will contain some repair.

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what if he gets defensive with me as soon as I sit down?

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">Can you share this fear with him? Maybe he can give some reassurance or simply show by his behavior that he is not defensive.

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Part of me wants to call the office and find out if he's done with me and if he is then maybe I shouldn't go?

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">Somehow I doubt he would tell you this over the phone! Sometimes we have these extreme fears and when we share them with T, they go, "what??!!"

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He never did call me back

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">I see it as a problem that his office administrator tells you he will call back and he won't. I think he needs to communicate better with the admin about his call back policies so that clients are not left dangling and get their hopes raised for a call.

Best of luck tomorrow. I am keeping my fingers crossed for you and sending good vibes.