the opinion of others does at times serve as a neccesary litmus test. I think this is one of them.

The fact that this child does not live with mom is even more reason to me to avoid this sort of coddling. The boy needs to be given the message that mom is still mom regardless of who has custody and that each parent is equal. This is her responsibility to ensure this is so. Mom needs to parent just as she would should he live with her permamently. At every effort should a noncustodial parent avoid the time they spend with their child turning into a holiday rather than a visit. This is why it's important to establish a healthy routine. It is the parent's responsibility to do so. The non-custodial home should be another home and NOT a vacation destination.