Thank you for all your responses. I want to update that my mother-in-law did come through with $5,000. It helped us with 1st months rent and security deposit on our new apartment. Just for info, I would never take someone's retirement money. I thought I made it clear she is a multi-millionaire. She has many annuities, whole life and CD' with anywhere from $40,000 to $90,000 in each one.Additionally, her pension is a 10,000 per month. She own two homes outright in San Francisco, second highest housing market after New York city. Very comfortable.

What I couldn't grasp was how she was perceiving the situation . I honesty couldn't gasp was it was about her that she had such financial insecurities, was she being mean or selfish My husband stands to inherit it all when she does pass, hopefully along time from now

Now that she has agreed, she is pleased to help her son's family and share the joy we have.

For naysayers "no money", it is a researchable fact that more than 50% of parents provide financial support to adult children.

Again, thank you for your feedback, it was helpful and this was the right place to ask.