Thank you MM and to everyone who thanked, hugged or responded. This morning I was so scared I'd lost this place as a "safe" place to talk about my issues, help others and vent. The fear was so terrible I could barely get myself to log on. I'm glad I did.

I feel so bad for my husband but he was so great at calming me down that I could never show him the amount of gratitude I have inside. I'm so glad this happened late and my kids were spared the confusion and chaos. My youngest son doesn't even know I'm really mentally ill and I prefer to avoid that confusion for him now. i am scared and embarrassed but also very thankful for my family and my PC family. (((Group hug)))