Thank you. That makes sense!! I get so nervous about doing things that might set him off.. but maybe if i did just go ahead and do it, he would react in such an ill manner that it would give me enough reason to justify leaving??

I feel absolutely sick to my stomach that i have let this go on so long and blindly ignored it. Not even recognizing what he has been actually doing 😔
It is probably why i have felt so empty and worthless.. because thats exactly what he wanted.

Now every time he is mean, threatening or controlling i can see it. I feel like he is suddenly a stranger to me.. i dont even know this man. I always thought he loved me to pieces... now i see that no man who loved me would treat me this way.

I did try to talk to him last night. I told him that we needed to talk, he refused. He told me my feelings were stupid and have no place in our relationship then proceeded to try to have sex with me.
I almost wish i was blind again... now all i see is my problematic relationship and i know it will never change.. and i dont see a way out. He said he will never let me leave. He said 'you just try it'.