It's a curious thing and I wonder if some others can relate to my perspective. While I struggle with many aspects of my psychosis, there are also certain hallucinations/presences that I've come take solace and comfort in. There's a regular presence that I see as a guiding and benevolent force in my daily life. He helps me in many ways and aids me in pushing through stress and other more hateful and damaging hallucinations. The music that plays around me semi-regularly also helps keep me calm at certain points. It's why I've explained to my pdoc that I don't want my AP doses too high.