Lefty- My wife feels pity for me and doesn't understand it. I explained how and why it began,put all my cards on the table so to speak. I went to therapy for a few sessions and for me it wasn't rewarding. Yes I was doing it before I met my wife,yes I should have said something then and didn't. As for my wife perhaps severely disciplining me that will not be happening. I am routinely caned/paddled to blood in session and she is not capable of the sadism I require. We have had a good life but I always felt bad I wasn't honest and always felt she deserved better. I just can't stop. Sad as it sounds my life has been horrible in the two months I haven't gone. It's all I have been able to think of. Some people need drugs to feel good,some need to see a therapist to feel good and I need to be dealt with severely by a Dominant woman to be fulfilled.