Today I dreamed about walking around the city and then some old woman started talking to me and she suggested I'll go with her on a bus trip with some kind of a theatre troupe, so I'll maybe like it and will become a part of it. And I wasn't sure but I did and then there were many older people on a bus, including a woman with cancer putting on her wig, and some older man that I considered unfriendly. Then we changed to a train and somehow I saw my mother following me. We stopped at some place, like a hostel, restaurant, I dunno, and there was a terrace outside and I saw something strange: there was a naked woman who tied herself to something and she was wailing and screaming and twisting her body like some kind of a martyr. And then I saw my mother who took her clothes off apart from her underwear and she ran outside to join her and I felt so embarassed.

My real life is now mostly about my sick grandmother and me feeling like a failure because I'm not helping enough unlike my parents etc.