Guess that was one of the benefits of being on disability at the time my Mother was dying. I didn't have work to have to worry about. I did have my own responsibilitys at the time (my horse had been injured & needed daily care). I was running between the hospital & my horse every day for while until my Mother came home from the hospital...unanounced (they didn't tell me they were discharging her until I was told by the person who manulipated her way into caring for my Mother). I just couldn't take care of the physical stuff....I wasn't strong enough in the first place & never could handle cleaning up after my daughter when she was a baby......just wasn't something I could handle. Unfortunate because if I could have, maybe that horrible person wouldn't have been able to manupilate her way into the situation.
I know at the time my Mother came home from the hospital, no one even said she was terminal or how long she might have but I could see how bad she was & from that point, I never left her alone. Little did I know at that time, she only had about 1 month left. It is important to be able to have the time together with your Mother.....sick leave can always be built up again, but the time you have with your mother can't be recovered.
It is important to take time for yourself.....but I would not make that be time trying to work. You will need your own time to relax & unwind because the stress of even a week or two weeks of non-stop care is harmful to the anxiety level. You don't want to get yourself sick the way I did & end up not being able to be there for her. You are a caring person but don't forget to care for yourself so you can care for your Mother.
I hope your sister can come to relieve you to give you that time for yourself....but please don't feel trapped to bring in just anyone who might be willing to "help you out". Unless they are from a licensed, bonded nursing register or something equivalent....don't even let them into your house. There are people preying on situations like this, just waiting for the right time to jump in to "help". It's just after the experience I had, I am leary of letting anyone into my life (even if I or someone else knows them to be good people).
Above all else, enjoy the time you have with your Mom & let the rest fall into place (along with a lot of good common sense),
Debbie
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Leo's favorite place was in the passenger seat of my truck. We went everywhere together like this.
Leo my soulmate will live in my heart FOREVER Nov 1, 2002 - Dec 16, 2018
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