I really need guidance of some form or the other. Something happened to me, I apologize in advance for triggering material.

A few months back I was swarmed, attacked, pushed down concrete stairs, robbed, and left there to scream with no help. I ended up with a sprained ankle and a concussion. Something you'd hear but think it was from a movie, that is how it felt. Instead it wasn't from a movie, it happened to me. Police arrested one of four suspects. I am still waiting on a court date but he is a minor so most likely will get a slap on the hand and sent off.

Before I was attacked, I was working on trauma work in counseling and felt really comfortable talking more about my past. Things don't seem to matter much, all that work I did, vanished. I am now dealing with something else, I barely talk, I barely go outside or leave the house. Working on intense things is too much for me and I, my body shuts off and I feel like I have died. It's not helping me in counseling because I am trying.

I refuse to talk about what happened.

The crime rate here is increasing with more stabbings, shootings, shots fired, people getting injured or killed... it wasn't like that before, then all of a sudden there is this spike in crime in the last 8 months. Every night it seems something is going on. I am scared to be in society because I've been attacked and thrown down stairs, what's to say someone won't shoot me or stab me? I am scared. I am petrified.

No one gets it. I am not normal. I can't breathe anymore. I feel uncomfortable all the time.

I barely talk since what happened to me in counseling, I mean I barely talk about anything anymore. I guess I busted my *** off to work on childhood trauma then next thing I know, I am nearly killed. (I keep say they murdered me)

I am not sure what I need or am asking for... I am having a hard time finding myself, it all seems pointless. I don't like how I feel. I hate how I want to talk and then I disappear into whatever, or my thoughts stop or I can't even think.

I feel trapped.