Hey everyone. I just wanted to vent, my current situation which is kind of a surprise and I'm not sure how I feel about it- mostly anxious and scared.

(I've kinda been having problems for a while, not feeling good or happy, etc. Just issues. Nothing extreme. My mum noticed and sent me to a doctor who I see regularly once a month, I've only seen her 3 times so far though. The main problem was about my weight, whatever, don't want/need to get into it.)

Anyway, the surprise literally came to me like an hour ago and it's stressing me out. I got a letter, and apparently my doctor thought it was a good idea to 'apply' me to a psychologist. I have an appointment to go next week.
I don't want to go. Of course I'm not gonna tell anyone I don't wanna go- I feel like if I voice that opinion I'll just come off as weird and my mum really believes I want/need the help. I don't wanna confuse or hurt her. (Of course I'd like to feel better sometimes, but let me explain)

I believe that nothing can help me- I'm just naturally miserable, sad all the time, and if not sad then angry. Just a lot of intense emotion, and also issues with my esteem, confidence, appearance, etc.
I don't want anyone to mess with my mind- as in change my views and opinionson things- you know what I mean. (I hope)

I don't know what I am going to say in the session. I literally have no idea what I am going to say or talk about- I hate opening up to people, but also have trouble putting things into words sometimes. I think it's kind of like an 'Alexithymia' thing.
But I'm just so scared. I feel like I know they are going to just judge me, I'm only going to waste their time and bother them. There is nothing to be done with me and I'm just panicking because I don't know what I'm gonna do.

I feel like we are just gonna sit there awkwardly, and they're just gonna ask me standard questions and I might not be able to answer properly- I don't know. They'll just end up with a conclusion like 'No she's normal she's just weird.' I know it sounds stupid but I'm genuinely concerned.
On one side I'm worried I'll end up being normal, because that would mean I'm wrong???? But on the other side I'm worried I'll end up with an illness because that would mean I'll have to take medication and therapy or something???? I really don't know, I'm just confused and conflicted.

Has anyone ever had a situation like that? Any suggestions, advice, tips? Anything?

(I'm sorry for my babbling I said I wasn't good at explaining things.)