I was thinking about the CBT as the shyt just hit the fan with my mother.

I suppose I could have held my tongue. I still would have ended up giving her what I was going to give her.

But she made it so ugly, she had no consideration or respect for me. Could I have calmly talked sense into her, convincing her she was wrong? I even had our agreement in writing which proved she was wrong.

Oh well, what's done is done. It's over.

No matter how i could keep my composure using CBT, she still made it too ugly for me to ever forgive or forget. She ruined something I wanted to be beautiful. She destroyed all good feelings about it for me.

Had I predicted her behavior, and I should have because that is the toxic behavior she always done, I wouldn't have fooled myself in the first place.

Now I have the doomed feeling about how things that I want to go well are only going to go awry with the people who I know always make things go bad.

It was only a material thing that I won't have now. Just let it go. Try to walk away with whatever is left of your sanity.